CHICAGO, IL - Jurgen Klinsmann announced his 23-player squad for next month’s international friendly against Mexico.
The U.S. national men’s soccer team faces a stern test against their CONCACAF rivals on April 15th in San Antonio.
Klinsmann called up several USMNT regulars from Major League Soccer, Liga MX, and European-based leagues, but none was more surprising than the call up of American Outlaws President Kkoery Donahoo.
Donahoo helped found the unofficial U.S. Soccer supporters group in 2007 in Lincoln, Nebraska for the sole purpose of personal profit and the near-impossible chance of getting called up.
“This is a dream come true,” Donahoo said from AO’s gold-plated headquarters. “American Outlaws has always been a vehicle for my own fortunes and finally I’ve come to the end of that road. No matter the hundreds of thousands of hours I’ve put in doing the most mundane details, back-breaking labor, and soul-crushing stresses of running this organization…. it was all for this.”
Klinsmann was full of praise for the new addition to his roster.
“I’ve always been committed to revolutionizing American soccer and finding new talent for the national team. If you thought Miguel Ibarra was far out…. well I got you now with Donahoo.”
“Granted I’ve got a few worries about his fitness level, but getting players in top shape is totally in my wheel house,” Klinsmann continued. “We’ll have him pulling his hamstring during camp in no time.”
Jurgen’s squad selection, and Donahoo’s choice in particularly, wasn’t without controversy.
“Once again this foreign coach has shown a total lack of understanding in his selection of Donahoo,” ESPN writer Todd Toddingtod wrote in a blog post following the squad announcement. “Selecting Donahoo is a total acquiescence to the bro culture that AO has built. If you know Korey… he’s the bro-iest bro I’ve ever met.”
Oddly enough Donahoo’s place on the field was not disclosed on the roster, but Klinsmann assured reporters during the roster announcement that he would most certainly play him out of position.